


Good Enough

by rutherfords (seblaiens)



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types
Genre: 69 (Sex Position), Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, BDSM, Blow Jobs, Cock & Ball Torture, Cunnilingus, Dom/sub, Drug Withdrawal, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Femdom, Hand Jobs, Mental Health Issues, Oral Sex, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rimming, Sex Magic, Somnophilia, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-15
Updated: 2017-07-22
Packaged: 2018-11-14 15:00:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 21,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11210481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seblaiens/pseuds/rutherfords
Summary: Sex comes easily to her; intimacy follows slowly. While Evelyn learns to love, Cullen learns to let himself be loved.





	1. You Are So Certain

He takes on the desk, his armour digging uncomfortably into her skin. Cullen knows that this isn’t ideal, that they should probably be smarter than fuck in his office, where three doors make it into a hot spot for scouts who need to get around the keep’s premises quickly and undisturbed. It’s never bothered him before, that he has no privacy. It helped him keep a clear head in the worst of his withdrawals, when the itch for lyrium was so bad all he could do was pace from wall to wall. It kept him away from it, knowing that someone would see him break down in the worst of his moments and succumb to an addiction he’d been trying to break for months.

Now though, he would kill for locks or a trap door that would wall off his private chambers from the floor below.

Evelyn moans as he fucks into her, and he’s happy enough to get this over with quickly so they can move to a more comfortable place. It won’t take him long to come - it’s been a long time since he’s lain with a woman, much less with one as attractive as Evelyn. 

They’re still mostly clothed, only their trousers and smalls pushed out of the way hastily so he can push his cock into her heat. They’re getting off together like they’re starved for it, quick and dirty, and it reminds Cullen of the way it had been in the Circles. Hushed trysts in dark corners or pressed together in single beds with other people always around, knowing, but not acknowledging. He’s fucking her like he would have fucked a mage, like he’s fucked the few female recruits the Templar’s had in their ranks. 

“Cullen,” Evelyn groans, her hands digging into his biceps at the only place where cold metal doesn’t shield him off from her touch, “your armour… it’s-” her face twists into one of agony instead of pleasure, “it’s digging into my hip.”

“I’m sorry,” Cullen mumbles, shifting slightly on top of her before he starts thrusting again, his hips snapping against hers, “is this better?” She waits a few seconds to judge before she draws her eyebrows together again, shaking her head. “I’m sorry,” Cullen repeats, sliding off her. His face is burning in shame, and he quickly turns away from her to tuck his hard and wet cock back into his breeches. 

“No, wait,” Evelyn calls out for him, frustration clear in her voice, “come here.”

He faces her again, swallowing hard when he sees Evelyn standing bent over his desk, her trousers pushed down to around her knees. Her cunt is on full display, red and swollen because of him. Her dark hair falls to the middle of her back before she reaches to pull her braid over her shoulder. 

“Fuck me like this,” she says, wiggling her ass at him in invitation. 

Cullen clears his throat and steps behind her, reaching for the ties of his breeches and loosening them again. It feels dirty to stand behind Evelyn like this. She deserves more than a quick fuck over his table for their first time - he’s usually not so brash with women, but something about her brings it out in him. Her cocksure personality, the way she’s been toying with him ever since they’d first met - asking him about chastity vows, _ of all things _ . He’d been prepared for a mage Inquisitor who would hate him for who is, who he’s been. What he wasn’t expecting was someone who was drawn for him for exactly these reasons. 

Cullen pulls out his cock again, still achingly hard, and rubs it against Evelyn’s pussy, up and down, circling it over her clit. His free hand is holding onto her waist, pushing up her clothes so he can touch her skin, realising only now that he’s still wearing his leather gloves. He raises his hand to his mouth and pulls it off with his teeth, returning to stroke over her skin the second it’s off. He repeats the same thing with the second glove, his cock resting against Evelyn’s pussy. She whines, arching her back to get him back inside of her, and Cullen quickly grabs the base of his cock and lines himself back up with her hole, pushing inside slowly, watching for any discomfort he could sense through tension on her body. He moans when Evelyn starts moving against him when he doesn’t begin thrusting into her right away, moving her ass against him before moving away from him again. He looks at her folds around the stretch of his cock, wet and pick as she takes him inside.

“Cullen,” she whines after a few seconds, looking at him over her shoulder, “please, this way is good.”

He nods and wraps his hands around her waist, holding her in place as he fucks into her. It’s hard to thrust while standing, and he has to adjust his stance a few times until he finds a position in which he doesn’t feel like he’ll make them both fall with a particularly hard thrust. There’s sweat dripping down the back of his neck, and his entire body feels hot beneath metal and padding. He can’t wait until they can go upstairs and he can finally take off his armour and Evelyn’s robes as well, get to see her completely naked and not just from the waist down. 

There’s no way for him to reach around Evelyn’s body and touch her clit in this position, and she herself has to hold onto his desk in order for them to stay upright. Cullen feels bad knowing she probably won’t get off while they’re still downstairs, and he feels his cock softening as thoughts of her not enjoying this fill his head. He bites his lip and lets his hands wander over her hips and ass, looking at her tan skin and the curves of her body in order to keep himself erect. This is the woman he’s been fantasising about for months, and now that he has the chance to experience all of her he’s fucking her from behind while she’s bent over his desk, with most of her clothes still on. Cullen bites his lip and furrows his eyebrows, thinking about how her breast had felt beneath his palm when he had touched her there earlier - he had still been wearing his gloves, and she’s wearing at least three layers on top. 

“Cullen,” Evelyn breathes out, arching her back, “stop.”

It takes him a few seconds to comprehend what she’s said, but then he’s pulling out, an apology already on his lips.

“Lets just go upstairs, all right?” Evelyn asks, her breathing unsteady. Her pupils are still blown wide when she turns around, and Cullen wants to thank the Maker that she’s not fed up with him yet.

They pull up their clothes yet again before making their way up the ladder into Cullen’s bedroom, and he feels embarrassed for the hole in his ceiling and the general state of disarray - there’s little more than a bed in his room, and a chest in which he stores his clothes. Evelyn doesn’t seem to mind, stepping in front of his bed and unbuttoning her vest, then her blouse. Cullen swallows when he sees the fabric fall to the floor, and quickly gets to working on his armour.

His coat comes off first, the fur that hides the sharp edges of the metal and hopefully serves its job of making him seems less stoic and more approachable - he’s never quite mastered being charismatic on his own, without something drawing in people first. Evelyn seems to think him a capable commander, but without a cause as big as the Inquisition, these men wouldn’t follow his orders.

His vambraces follow as he puts it on his armour stand, the the three pieces that make up his chest plate. His cock is soft by now and his throat is closed up. He feels uncomfortable in his own skin, knowing that he’s taking too long. When he looks back at the bed, he sees Evelyn already naked, her eyes closed as her fingers are playing between her legs. Cullen’s mouth runs dry at the picture of her pleasuring herself on top of his sheets, and he redoubles his effort of getting his clothes off, practically tearing at them until he’s standing naked in the middle of the room, his feet not quite taking him over to where Evelyn is lying. 

She’s beautiful - long legs, tan skin, a small birthmark on her ribs that he longs to runs his tongue over. She’s opened her braid, dark brown hair fanning out over the bed. And her breasts - Maker, once Cullen looks at them he can’t avert his gaze. They had looked good beneath clothing, but now, out in the open, they look even better. Evelyn is the definition of Free Marcher beauty - he’s seen so many girls trying to emulate her style and way of carrying herself in Kirkwall, never quite achieving it the way she does. He guesses she had to learn it as the daughter of a noble - she had been in control even in the Winter Palace, when he had longed to leave the place the moment he had set foot on the premises. She had lead when they danced, not minding when he had stepped on her toes more than once or twice, simply had smiled up at him as if he had any idea what he was doing.

He’d wanted to kiss her on that balcony away from all the noise, hold her until he forgot that they still had roles to play once they were to step back inside into the ballroom. Where she was the Inquisitor and he was her Commander, and nothing more, lest their relationship would be the talk of the evening instead of Evelyn’s heroic efforts in saving Empress Celene. A soft brush of his lips over her forehead had sufficed. 

Now, though, he had the chance to do to her what he wanted, and he wasn’t taking it in fear she would reject him.

“Come here,” Evelyn says, pulling Cullen back into the present. She’s turned onto her side and looking up at him, her arm extended in an invitation to join him. He feels like a brute when he stomps over to hear, having none of her grace. 

He gets on top of her, body between her stretched legs, and kisses her. There’s a chill in his room due to the decayed state it’s in, a he feels Evelyn shiver beneath him, and they stop kissing for only a few seconds to crawl beneath the sheets before they find each other's lips again. She doesn’t waste any time to slip her tongue into his mouth, and her hands travel up and down his back with no shame. She’s so free with the love and affection she gives - Cullen can’t remember the last time he hugged someone who wasn’t her. During his Templar training probably, before he left for the Fereldan Circle - he left behind the friends he made during the five years he had stayed there, the ones who ended up feeling like brothers and sisters. 

“Stop thinking for just a few hours, please,” Evelyn whispers into his ear when she breaks off their kiss. “I want you to enjoy this.”

“I want  _ you _ to enjoy this,” Cullen states, staring down into her bright green eyes. He brushes a few strands of hair from her face, cradling her jaw in his hand and not breaking off their eye contact. He really shouldn’t have taken her from behind or with all his armour on - it seems disrespectful to not give her the courtesy of a more conventional first time between them.

“Lie on your back,” Evelyn says after sighing. Cullen complies, feeling a little exposed when Evelyn pushes the duvet back down so it’s pooling around Cullen’s knees. His legs are spread so she can sit between them, and his soft cock feels like an insult to her. She lowers herself on her front and begins stroking and licking over him, carefully pulling back his foreskin so her tongue can run over the head of his cock and collect the fluid that had gathered there from when he’s still been hard and leaking. Her tongue is hot and silky as it runs over him, and Cullen fists the sheets when his cock begins to harden again. 

He watches as she takes him into her mouth, bobbing her head up and down, occasionally glancing up at his face to judge how he likes it before closing her eyes again. The deeper she goes, the more Cullen has to press himself into the bed to not accidentally buck up into her throat - it feels too good, having her work him like this. 

“Eve,” he says after a while, reaching down to cup her jaw, “let me…”

She nods and turns onto her back next to him, watching him with slightly opened and wet lips as he climbs over her. He kisses the middle of her chest, letting his mouth travel over her breasts and licking over one of her nipples, while rolling the other one between his fingers. His cock jerks when he feels them harden, and he has to hold himself back from putting his face in-between her breasts and pillowing himself there. He leans back to sit on his knees and cups both of her tits in his hands, pushing them together to create the cleavage Evelyn likes to show off with tight and low-cut clothing - he’s seen many men staring at her not in awe because she is the Inquisitor, but because her rack is one of the best ones in Skyhold. If they happened to be one of his soldiers, he had made them run laps around the training grounds, but he had been able to do nothing but glare at The Iron Bull and Blackwall. 

Evelyn laughs as he stares at her chest, arching her back so her breasts press into his palms. “You like them?”

“You know I do,” Cullen admits, a little embarrassed. He leans down again so he can run his lips over the dark peaks of her nipples, sighing at the feeling of running his lips over them. He wonders how he got so lucky that her body is as beautiful as her personality - and that she loves him back.

He works his way down her body, kissing around her belly button before his tongue connects with her clit. She smells thickly of her arousal, and she’s still so wet that his tongue slips over her when he licks down between her parted folds. He carefully pushes a finger inside her, slipping in a second one when she spreads her legs farther in response. Evelyn is already writhing beneath him, finally getting the stimulation that’s been lacking when they had fucked downstairs in the office. Cullen is surprised he’s getting her off so quickly - he’s completely out of practice and, quite frankly, doesn’t have that much experience, anyway. The few women he’s slept with over the years had always been covert affairs that had never went anywhere. 

“Maker, Cullen,” Evelyn moans, her hands coming to rest on top of his head, “don’t you dare stop now.” 

Cullen smiles as he circles his tongue around her clit, moving the fingers inside Evelyn up and pressing against her walls. It sounds filthy, what he’s doing to her, and Cullen suddenly has the vivid mental image of somebody walking through his office downstairs and hearing what they’re up to - he dismisses these thoughts. It’s already dark out, and people don’t make it a habit to disturb him after sundown. 

Evelyn comes around his fingers, and Cullen pulls them out while she’s still coming, silencing her cry of protest by replacing them with his cock. They’re face-to-face again, and Evelyn rises up to connect their lips as she wraps her legs around his waist, pulling him down and deeper inside her. Cullen moans into the kiss, snapping his hips until he can hear the slap of their bodies connecting, filling them room with the filthy sounds of their bodies. Evelyn strokes over his back, her nails digging into skin as she runs them down towards his ass. She cups his cheeks and presses him even closer, until his balls are resting against her. 

“I’ve waited months for this.” She licks her lips after they part. “You should have fucked me sooner.”

Cullen doesn’t reply, instead thrusts inside her particularly hard, making her eyes roll back before he picks up his pace again. He’s embarrassingly close already, but at least he knows she had already come this time around, taking some of the pressure off him. 

He comes with a muffled gasp, hiding his face in the crook of Evelyn’s neck. Her hair tickles against his nose, but he doesn’t mind - his cock is throbbing inside her as he fills her up, and he can feel her pulse where his lips touch her throat. His eyes are already fluttering shut as exhaustion sets into his limbs, and he rolls off Evelyn before he manages to crush her beneath the weight of his body. She curls up to his the second he’s on his back.

“Do you have something to clean up?” she whispers into his ear. Cullen nods, sighing as he gets up from bed and walks over to the chest on the adjacent wall of his bedroom, opening it to take out one of the towels he keeps there. He almost falls asleep as Evelyn cleans herself, but he forces himself to open his eyes again when Evelyn kisses his collarbone, looking up at him as her lips caress his skin. Her hand runs through the light hair on his chest and follows the trail down to his crotch.

“Your hair is so… blond,” she says, smiling down at the curls. “I’ve never seen body hair that light.”

“Does the hair bother you?” Cullen asks, realising that he hadn’t even spent a second thinking about grooming himself before having sex with her. “I could trim, if you want me to.”

“It doesn’t,” she answers, taking her nails through his chest hair. “Do you mind mine? I usually went to get waxes in Ostwick, but Skyhold is lacking in that department. Vivienne’s been complaining about it since we’ve gotten here.” Evelyn chuckles.

“I prefer some hair,” Cullen admits, thinking of the  _ one _ time he went to the Blooming Rose and had been faced with a hairless crotch, “...short though- but if you would rather let it grow, I won’t mind-”

“It’s all right,” Evelyn says, rolling half on top of him, “I’ll keep it short then.” She smiles and kisses him chastely. Cullen wraps his arms around her waist, sighing into kiss. It feels nice, to hold her like this, feeling the weight of her body pressing him down. Her legs are on either side of his body and their chests are pressed together, slightly sticky with sweat.

“So…” Evelyn mumbles after a few seconds, her head resting on Cullen’s chest, “why  _ did _ we not do this sooner? It wasn’t for a lack of me trying to get you into bed.”

Cullen chuckles tiredly, hoping he could talk his way out of this conversation without putting his foot in his mouth. He had deflected all her attempts at getting him into bed before now, not wanting to sleep with her while he hadn’t been sure about her feelings towards him yet. He didn’t want to get his feelings hurt in the long run, no matter how great the temptation had been during the few months they’ve been seeing each other. “We  got there eventually, didn’t we?”

“Very evasive, Commander.” Evelyn raises her eyebrows. “Now, tell me the real reason.”

“I did not want to put a stain on your reputation,” Cullen lies. “Our relationship might reflect badly upon your status as Inquisitor.”   
  
“Everybody already thinks we’ve been sleeping together,” Evelyn says, now furrowing her brows, knowing he’s lying to her. “You weren’t opposed to kissing me while other people were around.” She pokes him in the ribs. 

“All right.” Cullen sighs. “I just… wasn’t sure before.”

“...about me?”

“No!” Cullen exclaims, wrapping his arms around Evelyn and squeezing her tightly to his body. “Maker, no, never about you. Just how… sustainable this relationship would be.” 

Evelyn still looks sceptical, but she drops the subject for now. Cullen strokes over her back to soothe her, hoping it would brighten her mood. She seems to decide to drop the subject for now, kissing over Cullen’s body again and letting her mouth travel over his chest. 

“Tired?” She asks when Cullen sighs, his eyes closed as he enjoys her affections. He nods. “I’m not going to let you sleep tonight. Not much, at least.”

“Oh, really?” Cullen asks, not able to stop a grin from forming on his face. 

“Hmm. You thought I was going to be done after just once?” She sits up on him, her crotch just above where his cock lies. Cullen rests his hands on her hips, letting his eyes travel over her toned body. Her breasts really are big - it’s even more apparent from this angle, the fulness of them accentuated by her slim waist. Her hips are broad again with a shapely bum he’s spent enough time ogling, but his eyes always seem to linger on her chest - it’s his favourite feature of her body, he decides. 

“I like being on top,” Evelyn says, licking over her lips when Cullen’s hands travel up to squeeze her breasts. 

“I like you on top,” Cullen replies, deciding that, yes, he really _ did  _ like it. He’s always been the less experienced with his partners - he doesn’t mind Evelyn taking charge at all, just like all the women before her had. 

“I also want to try something.” Before Cullen can ask what, Evelyn is turning around on his body and scooting up the bed, until her crotch is above his face. She leans forward and takes his cock in hand, carefully licking over his soft shaft. “I can taste myself on you,” she mumbles before taking him in mouth, doing her best to get him hard again.

Cullen sighs at the warmth of her mouth returning, taking a few seconds before he pulls Evelyn down by her hips, so he doesn’t have to strain his neck in order to lick over her cunt. She tastes like him as well, or at least he guesses he does - he’s never tried tasting himself. He knows Evelyn had men and women before him, and that growing up partly in the Circle, partly as the only daughter of a noble with four older brothers would have exposed her to many opportunities to have sex with whomever she pleased. He knows it’s different from Circle to Circle, but generally the mages were very…  _ open _ , with their sexuality. Much more so than the Templars.

Evelyn’s skilled mouth coaxes him back to being hard, while Cullen busies himself with drawing circles over her clit with his tongue. He’s had women sit on his face before, but they’ve never reciprocated at the same time - it’s a little hard to concentrate on pleasing her when she licks over the sensitive head of his cock, but he likes this as well. She might teach him a thing or two in the bedroom, he realises - he hopes he won’t disappoint her by how vanilla his sex life had been until now. 

Evelyn pulls off him with an obscene pop of her lips, licking the slit of his dick a few times - Cullen’s legs jerk with how good it feels, not able to keep his muscles from spasming in response. She turns again and Cullen can barely comprehend the change in position until his cock is inside her and she’s bouncing on top of him, her hair falling into her face as she places her hands on his chest, pressing him into the bed. He goes to grab for her hips, but she intercepts his hands and presses them down into the mattress above his head, a wolfish smile on her lips. 

“Keep your arms down,” she orders before she leans back until she’s sitting straight on top of him, lowering herself on his cock until there’s no more she can take inside. Cullen has to close his eyes for a few seconds when she starts touching herself, rubbing over her clit and letting her finger travel over where Cullen’s cock disappears inside her. Cullen grabs onto the pillow so he doesn’t reach out and help her, and he’s tempted to just ignore her orders so he can touch her, get her off, finally make her  _ move _ . Right at that moment, she looks down at him as if she’s read his mind, her green eyes sparkling in mischievous glee. 

“Problems?” She asks, her voice teasing as she sees him struggle. 

“Please,” Cullen gasps, “ _ please _ move.”

Evelyn laughs, throwing her head back in her neck. “You just have to ask,” she says as she begins bouncing on him, holding herself up with one hand on his thigh, the other still circling her clit. “You ask for so little, and take even less.” 

Cullen grits his teeth as he watches Evelyn move on top of him. He can see himself slide inside of her with every movement of her body, and he feels his balls drawing up to his body he’s so turned on. Everything feels tight in his crotch, and he can’t stop the grunts that come from his chest when Evelyn begins moaning, her fingers on his leg tightening so her nails dig into his skin. He watches her as she makes herself come, showing no sign of slowing down even as her orgasm subsides, instead only going faster. Purple sparks of magic bounce from her fingers over his skin, hot when it touches him but disappearing so fast he can barely feel it.

“Mm, Cullen,” she gasps, “I’ve waited months for this.” Cullen can barely press out a _ ‘Maker’  _ before he feels himself get close to the edge, but before he can spill, Evelyn is climbing off him. He lets out a desperate sob when his cock slips out, but then there’s the heat of her mouth around him and her hands on his shaft, jerking him off.

“I want to taste you,” she says, looking up at his face, before she takes as much of his cock in her mouth as she can, one of her hands playing with his balls. Cullen closes his eyes and comes silently, his fingers buried in the pillow, and his legs drawing up so his feet are flat on the bed. He feels Evelyn swallow around him, licking his cock for every drop of his come after the last few spurts dribble out. His heart is beating so fast he can feel it in his ears.

He might have passed out for a few seconds, but when he opens his eyes, Evelyn is cuddled into his side again, her fingers back in his chest hair. Their bodies are hot, the duvet pushed down onto the floor next to Cullen’s side of the bed, but it’s still too hot in his room. They would be freezing soon enough, when their adrenalin wore off and the cold breeze that constantly moved in through the hole in his roof would dry their sweat. For now, all he does is wrap Evelyn in his arms, hold her tightly against him.

“Evie,” he whispers in her ear, a confession of love on his tongue, “Eve...” 

“Don’t destroy the moment,” Evelyn says, her voice muffled as she presses her face against his body. Cullen chuckles and swallows down his words. They would have enough time for words tomorrow, after cleaning up and redressing. He’s not planning on blurting out his feelings without thinking about it, but sometimes he can’t help himself - he’s not good with words, a man of action. 

“...I won’t be able to come again,” Cullen says instead. It takes a few seconds for Evelyn to process what he’d said, but then she’s laughing.

“I guess I’ll let you sleep after all,” she replies, a yawn escaping her. “But before you pass out, one thing.”

“What is it?”

“You really should have pulled out, I don’t have any witherstalk around for accidents like these.”

Cullen’s mouth runs dry. He really should have asked her about precautions-  _ Maker, _ what if he got her pregnant while she was supposed to fight what was practically a _ god _ -

“Don’t worry, I’ve gambled on it before. The chance is so slim, it’ll probably work out.”

“Probably?” Cullen asks, staring up at the ceiling of his room. “ _ Maker’s breath _ , Evelyn, you should have said something-”

“Relax,” she says as she leans over him and off the bed to pull up the duvet, “I can probably ask… someone. We should have witherstalk in bulks here, right?”   
  
“Right,” Cullen repeats, still a little shaken. “I’ll be…  _ withdrawing, _ from now on.”

“Thank you.” Evelyn presses a wet kiss against his cheek before curling into the mattress. He spoons her as she falls asleep, leaving Cullen awake with his thoughts for a little while before he, too, drifts off into the Fade. 


	2. And I’m Full Of Doubt

Slowly but surely, Cullen moves his things into Evelyn’s bedroom. It starts out with him having to move out in order for construction work to take place - Evelyn had said she’d spent the whole night shivering in his bed after their first time together, and she would not stay over again unless the tower got re-roofed and a trap door installed. The latter was more a precaution of privacy, but Cullen had to agree - he didn’t want to wake up to somebody poking their head into his bedroom when Evelyn was lying naked in his bed. 

He likes her bedroom - it’s a big and open space, and he can leave the balcony door open. He hasn’t been good with confined spaces since Kinloch Hold, barely made it through the ship ride to Kirkwall when he transferred there. On the way back to Ferelden, he hadn’t even tried going under deck, staying up and staring out at the ocean. Cassandra had kept him company, and after she had gone to sleep, Varric. It was curious to actually talk to the dwarf after almost a decade of being in each other’s periphery, yet never quite interacting. He knew a little too much about him, Cullen had decided. Things he’d rather kept in the Free Marches, instead of bringing back to Ferelden.

“What are  _ you _ thinking so hard about?” 

Cullen turns from where he’s standing on the balcony. Evelyn is leaning against the railing of the stairs that lead up to the room, her arms crossed in front of her chest. She’s wearing her usual robes that protect her when she’s out in the field - taupe underclothes and a white coat, shoulder padding added not for protection, but for style. He shook his head when he had seen her gear the first time around, resisting the urge to run into the smithery and commission a good set of armour for her. She needs to be agile to wield her staff, but it wouldn’t hurt to put a little more iron on her.

“Were you sparring?” he asks when he spots her staff strapped to her back, a hideous thing with a skull at the tip. It’s one of her favourites, looted in the Western Approach. He had bit back the question of if it was wise to wield a staff of unknown origins. All the ones that had been allowed in the Circle had been made by trusted Tranquils and checked over by the Templars before the mages were allowed to use them.

“Dorian, Vivienne, Solas, and I were just going over some barrier techniques,” Evelyn calls out before stepping next to him, looking over the horizon. “I’m rubbish at them, but Solas is a good teacher.” Cullen can hear the bitterness in her voice when she admits to the elf being better at something than her. He presses a kiss against her temple and wraps an arm around her waist as he pulls her against his body.

“I’m sure you could set him jumping with your storm magic before he could even think of conjuring a barrier.”

Evelyn laughs sharply. “I’d pay to see his face.”

Cullen smiles and leans down to kiss her, turning them so their bodies are pressed against each other. His hands travel from her waist to her hip, and then around her body to rest on her ass. She’s only been back from Emprise Du Lion for a few days, and he’s still feeling frisky from not being able to see her for over a month. He’s spent many nights fantasising about her being in bed with him, his hand wrapped around his aching erection as he recalled the feeling of her mouth or cunt. 

“Missed me?” Evelyn teases, running her hands beneath Cullen’s shirt, feeling over his abs. “I told you we should have done it this morning, I was dripping all day. I think Dorian saw me rubbing off against my staff.”

Cullen moans when Evelyn reaches between his legs, squeezing his cock and balls through his breeches. He slots his lips over hers, pushing his tongue inside and exploring her mouth. He’s glad her balcony faces the mountains and not the courtyard, for he’s sure Josephine would hold them a lecture about decency if people saw what they did with each other. What  _ she _ does to  _ him _ .

“We had to go to a meeting,” Cullen says as he steps away from her, holding her by her wrist and pulling her back into the room. “It might have been alright before, but now people will  _ know  _ why we’re late.” 

“You still pretend like everyone thinks that we’re waiting for marriage.” Evelyn rolls her eyes as Cullen takes off her coat and  pushes her onto the bed, climbing between her legs. He kisses over her throat and opens the first few buttons of her top so he can lick over her collarbone and the tops of her breasts. “Even Michel has picked up on that, and he’s only been here for a few days.”

“Good,” Cullen says, quirking his eyebrow at her. “It’s not a secret, as you’ve mentioned.”

“Mm, but I like it when he flirts with me,” Evelyn whines, smiling, her eyes closed. “He’s so tall and handsome…”

“All right. Invite him up, I’ll leave you two alone.” Cullen sits up, laughing when Evelyn makes a grab for him and pulls him back on top of her. 

“You’re much prettier, and I like your accent more.” 

“Not a fan of Orlesian?” Cullen asks, evading Evelyn’s lips when she leans up to kiss him. “I always thought women loved men who speak like squawking peacocks.” 

“Fereldan farm boy is much more my style.” She finally catches his lower lip between her teeth, softly biting at him and pulling him down. “Though you don’t sound very…”

“Peasant-like?” Cullen raises his eyebrows. He knows Evelyn is classist - she never outright means to favour the nobles over the commoners at Skyhold, but it’s clear in her interactions how much more she values their input. “My parents worked for King Cailan, and King Maric before that. They put a lot of stock into our education.” 

“I wasn’t saying you’re uneducated,” Evelyn defends herself, a knot forming on her forehead. “I know the Templars learn to read and write during training, and that they know a lot about history and magic-”

“So you’re saying without my Templar training I  _ would _ have been-”

“Stop putting words into my mouth!” Evelyn interrupts him and pushes him off her body. She sits on the edge of the bed, her back turned towards Cullen, with her arms crossed in front of her chest. Cullen’s not sure how to react to this - their fights until now had purely been professional and carried out in the war room with at least Josephine and Leliana there to mediate. Disagreeing with her on a more personal level is new for them, and while he knows their political opinions and social standing differ, he hasn’t put much thought into how it would affect them.

He hears a frustrated sigh coming from Evelyn before she turns around again, lying down on the bed next to him.

“You know I don’t think you’re stupid.”

“I do,” Cullen agrees, pulling her back into his arms. He shouldn’t have prodded her - she talks before thinking when around him, a privilege Cullen knows to cherish when he sees her calculate every word when standing in front of a crows. “Let’s just… forget about it.”

 

They get ready for bed, Evelyn cleaning herself up with a damp towel before slipping into bed next to him, wearing nothing. His cock jerks when he sees her walk from the wash room over to their bed, not bothered in the least by her nakedness. 

“Are we sleeping with the balcony doors open again?” she asks as she gets comfortable, covering herself up to her neck. Cullen bites his lip. He feels a lot less claustrophobic with the doors open, but he knows Evelyn minds the cold - he couldn’t care less, having slept beneath a broken down roof for months before moving into her quarters. His tower is fixed now, but he only sleeps there when Evelyn isn’t around and he’s working late into the night. 

“I can close it, if you’d like.”

“That would be marvelous.” Evelyn leans over to kiss Cullen’s cheek, then sighs and lies on her back. The floor is cold as Cullen walks over to the balcony, chilling his feet and making him shudder, but the second he closes the doors, his throat closes up. Evelyn’s room is big enough - he shouldn’t be bothered by the walls closing in around him, but something about the high ceiling… it reminds him too much of the Harrowing chamber. He stares out at the horizon wistfully for just a second longer before making his way back. He already feels warmer and as if heavy armour is pinning his body down after days of exhaustion. 

Evelyn opens her eyes and smiles at him as he lies down next to her, pressed against his body the second his back hits the mattress. She climbs on top of him, already pushing up the thin, long-sleeved shirt he wears to bed. Growing up with the strict discipline of Templar training had made it necessary to be dressed modestly at every hour, for Cullen had never known if they would have drills in the middle of the night. He wonders if Evelyn had slept naked in the Circle - he wouldn’t put it past her, with as little shame she feels about her body as she does. 

“I’ve been thinking about you all day,” Evelyn whispers as she pulls the shirt over his head, her mouth descending onto his throat and sucking kisses down on his skin, before she moves to lick over each of his nipples. “Dorian almost hit me over the head with his staff every time I stopped paying attention to Solas blabbering about the fade…  _ ‘If I have to listen, you do as well,’ _ ” Evelyn imitates Dorian’s voice.

“He’s right,” Cullen says, closing his eyes and trying to just enjoy the feeling of Evelyn’s mouth on his. “Your barriers are awful. It couldn’t hurt to train them.” He gasps when Evelyn bites his nipple, then soothes it with her tongue. 

“Sometimes I forget that you know a thing or two about magic, as well.”  _ Stop criticizing me. _

“You’re quite a capable mage, from what I’ve seen. Most apprentices go for fire or ice magic, instead of storm.”  _ You can take it. _

Evelyn hums and moves lower, kissing over Cullen’s abdomen. His cock is still soft, and he’s dreading the look of slight disappointment Evelyn will let show once she takes off his trousers. It takes some effort, sometimes, to get him hard, even more to get him to actually orgasm. He’s been lucky enough that these occasions have never crossed over to his time with Evelyn - except their first time, when he was so up in his own head he could barely enjoy her body, down in his office. No, usually it’s when he lays hand on himself that he gives up after a few minutes, huffing and annoyed that he doesn’t even know how to touch himself correctly. It’s been gradually getting better the last few months, but it seems he’s hit a low patch again.

Evelyn takes the strings that hold his trousers together in her mouth, looking up at him as she moves her head away so the tie that holds them together loosens. It’s an incredibly erotic sight, and he finally feels his cock jerk, though he’s still not even half hard. 

With the tie loose, Evelyn is able to pull down his trousers to his knees, sitting up to lift them off his legs completely. She lies down between his legs before licking a broad swipe over his shaft, her tongue wet, and hot, and velvety on the sensitive skin. Cullen closes his eyes and licks over his lips, spreading his legs a little wider. He feels blood rushing into his cock, but not nearly enough to make him hard, and thinking about how bad he would make her feel if he didn’t get hard isn’t making the situation any easier. He opens his eyes to look at her body, get himself excited by the curves of her ass and tits, but his cock stays as soft as before.

Evelyn doesn’t seem too concerned yet, taking his cock in hand and lifting it so the tip of it points towards Cullen’s belly button. She leans down to lick over his balls, her tongue hesitantly caressing them before she grows bolder, taking them in her mouth and sucking softly. Cullen moans and his cock jerks in her hand when her grip becomes tighter around the base of it, to the point where it almost hurts. At least he can clearly feel it - all other sensations feel slightly muted.

He tries to remember how hard he had been outside on the balcony, barely pressing against Evelyn’s body and ready to take her then and there. He should have done it - they don’t have enough chances to have sex as it is, and Evelyn clearly isn’t satisfied with just once a day. The tentative hardness his cock had built up over the last few minutes disappears at that thought, and he sees Evelyn’s face fall when she feels it in her hand.

“Lie down,” Cullen says after clearing his throat, climbing on top of her when she complies. He takes himself in hand and presses the head of his cock against her cunt, rubbing up and down in one last, desperate attempt. He’s surprised by how wet she is, but then again she had desperately tried to keep him in bed this morning already. He should have just fucked her back then before he had the time to think about it.

The head of his cock slips into her, but Cullen has to keep his hand around his cock in order for him to stay inside. Evelyn’s eyes are closed and her lips pressed tightly together - it’s all Cullen needs to see to know she isn’t enjoying herself. He scoots down her body and parts her legs further, pressing his face between her thighs before kissing each of them. 

He licks away most of her juices on his first swipe, having to swallow a few times before he can start thrusting his tongue inside of her. Evelyn lets out a moan and her hands reach down to run through Cullen’s hair, her legs closing around his head. He’s good at this, at least - Evelyn’s told him before how much she enjoys it when he goes down on her, that that’s the quickest she’s ever come with someone between her legs. He enjoys servicing her, tasting and smelling her arousal before he allows himself to take her. She deserves all that, and more.

“Your fingers,” Evelyn gasps, opening her legs again. Cullen complies, running his tongue up to her clit to draw slow circles over it before he pushes his middle and ring finger inside her, pressing against her walls. Her fluids are dripping down his chin she’s so wet, and judging from the way she’s clenching around him, it won’t take her much longer to come. Cullen presses his tongue harder into her clit, letting his free hand travel up her body to grasp her breast, rolling a nipple between his fingers.

Evelyn comes with a shout, a few drips from her cunt running down her skin and dripping onto the mattress. Cullen looks at the wet spot beneath her in astonishment  - contrasting her enjoyment with his own lacking sexual appetite makes him feel…  _ broken, _ in a way. His cock is still pathetically soft, even though he normally enjoys licking her more than enough to get hard.  

He lies back down, keeping a careful distance between them. He pulls the covers around himself before palming over his cock beneath them, but to no avail. 

“Is… something wrong?” Evelyn’s voice comes from the side, sounding quiet and sad. “I thought you wanted- back on the balcony you were hard, right?”

“It just… happens sometimes,” Cullen tries to explain, closing his eyes so he doesn’t have to look at her. 

“Is it something I did?” 

“Maker, no, Eve…” Cullen rolls on his side and wraps his arms around her, nestling her face against his chest. Her hair a little dirty from sweating during her training session, but even now she still smells good to him. Even without those fancy Orlesian perfumes she likes. “It’s not anything you’ve done or not done.”

Evelyn nods, rubbing her face against his chest. He strokes over her back for a while, hoping it would calm her and lull her to sleep, but he knows she’s too worked up to even close her eyes at the moment.

“You know,” she begins, her voice muffled, “I could try… something. I heard about it before from Dorian, but I’m not sure if you’d like it.”

Cullen hesitates. “If you want to put something inside my-”

“Oh! Oh, Maker, no.” A tired laugh escapes Evelyn’s lips. “We can try that another time.” 

“Good.” Cullen breathes out a relieved sigh. He loves Evelyn and the fact that she’s more adventurous than him, but he’s not quite ready for that level of intimacy yet. “So, what do you mean?”

“I was thinking,” Evelyn begins, trailing her fingers over Cullen’s side, “that I’ve never used my magic on you before. Neither while sparring, nor in bed.”

“We’ve never sparred together.”

“It would be an unfair fight.”   


“I don’t know if my Templar talents still work without the lyrium-”

“I meant for you. It would be unfair towards you.” 

Cullen rolls his eyes but smiles, hiding it by pressing his face into Evelyn’s hair. He’s glad she’s back to joking already, even if it is to save her pride - and dangling the fact that she’s more powerful than him over him seems to always cheer her up. He allows her that small bit of feeling superior - he knows she needs it.

“Magic in bed,” Cullen breathes out eventually. “How does that work?”

“Never spent a night with a mage before me?” Evelyn asks, grinning down at him as she climbs onto his lap. “One would think the Templars and mages would, considering we spend so much time locked up together.”

“Not in Ostwick, I take it? In the Fereldan one we had… rumours. Some of them more true than others.”

“Oh,” Evelyn laughs, raising her eyebrows, “sounds… interesting. Any rumours about you?” 

“Well…” He doesn’t want to talk about it - the memories of Kinloch Hold are too intertwined with memories of lying on cold, stone ground, his friends dying around him and stinking of rotting flesh while demon’s are keeping him alive, torturing him with visions of his own imagination. “I was just a boy back then, too young to really fancy anyone.”

“I had my eyes on a Templar, but I was too shy to say anything.” 

“Shy? You?” Cullen laughs, not able to think of the woman writhing on his lap as a blushing young girl not knowing how to approach a man she wanted.

“My brother told me to keep away from him. Apparently he was transferred from his old Circle because of an affair with an Enchanter. Another strike on his record, and he would have been exiled from the Order.” 

Cullen hums, lost in thought. During his time in the Order, he never saw proof of any fraternising in neither Ferelden, nor Kirkwall. Ferelden was very discreet when it came to relationships between the Templars and mages, and not just because of Knight-Commander  Greagoir and his not so secret affair with Senior Enchanter Wynne that had begun and ended years before Cullen had started working there

.”I had my fun with the girls instead, and saw some men on the weekends when I was allowed outside,” Evelyn continues, sitting up straight and running her hands down Cullen’s chest. “The male mages in the Circle were all… lanky and awkward. Nothing like you.”

“Like me?” Cullen asks, cocking his head to the side. 

“You know. Muscular and handsome. A few scars to prove they’ve faced the world in all its ugliness.”

“You make it sound rather more romantic than it is.”  

Evelyn shrugs, and then a few sparks of storm magic leave her fingertips, bouncing over Cullen’s skin like they did the first time they had sex. Only this time they’re a little more powerful, burning hotter and zapping his skin as they linger for just a few moments too long. He bites his lip, trying to remember that this is  _ Evelyn _ , not some blood mage who wants to taunt and humiliate him. It’s alright if he keeps his eyes open and can look at her, he finds.

“How does that feel?” Evelyn whispers, moving her hand over his chest and sparking up every inch of his skin she touches. 

“...Different.” Cullen doesn’t have another word to describe it - he only knows the touch of healing magic, and the pain of getting hit by a fireball after being too slow to raise one’s shield. Feeling the magic he’s so used to fighting in such a different context - it’ll take getting used to. 

“And if I do… that?” Evelyn asks, gripping Cullen’s cock. It doesn’t feel like much at first, but the longer he goes without saying something, the more power Evelyn puts into her spell. It first starts to tingle, then there are occasional sparks of hotness, until his cock starts throbbing and hardening from the repeated assault of zaps against the sensitive skin. It almost gets to be too much, and Cullen routinely reaches for Evelyn’s wrist to stop her from releasing any more raw power - it seems his Templar abilities have not yet suffered from stopping lyrium.

“Not fair,” Evelyn murmurs, keeping her magic at a low hum.

“I’m sorry.” Cullen blinks up at the ceiling, then puts his arms below his head. It reminds him of when Evelyn had told him to keep them down when she had rode him - it had seemed like torture, watching her move on top of him and not being allowed to touch. He wonders when he had started doing it willingly.

Evelyn builds up the power of the spell again, until Cullen’s leg is jerking from storm magic washing over his body. His cock is hard, but it doesn’t feel like any other time he’s felt aroused - this is sharper, pleasure and pain mixing together and bringing him closer and closer to the edge, without the normal build up of an orgasm. He looks down at Evelyn’s hand around his cock, purple lights flicking along with the normal glow of the anchor flaring up now and then. The head of his cock is red and glistening , and the veins on his shaft are strangely pronounced, probably in response to the magic. His mouth opens as Evelyn spits onto the head, slicking her palm to make the drag up and down easier - he hadn’t minded the slight discomfort of a dry hand before, but the slide of it feels incredible with the added saliva. 

He’s still watching as he starts coming, the spurts of his come surprising both of them - his pleasure seems delayed, hitting him in soft waves instead of the sharp spike he’s used to feeling. His whole body begins trembling as he spills over Evelyn, dripping come onto his abdomen, spurts of it hitting just above his navel. His entire body trembles with the shocks of his release, and he closes his eyes when Evelyn stops her spell, leaning down to lick over the head of his cock, licking away the drops that cling to his head. She holds back his foreskin as he gets soft again, cleaning first his cock and then moving on to lick over his torso, her tongue picking up every last drop.

“That was…” Cullen swallows, dry throat clicking. “It felt- I’m not sure.”

“I know,” Evelyn chuckles, “weird, huh?”

“Yes.” 

“But you liked it?”

“Very much so."   


Evelyn looks happy, but tired. It must have drained her, using her magic so shortly after what was sure to have been a difficult sparring session with the other mages. She lies down next to him, drying her hand on the sheets of their bed before stroking over Cullen’s chest. 

“Interesting that your Templar abilities still come to you so easily, even after months off lyrium.”

“Yes,” Cullen agrees quietly, already in the process of nodding off. He feels Evelyn cuddle against his side, pressing her forehead against his shoulder, before his limbs start getting heavy.

When he wakes up, it’s as though he had just closed his eyes.

It’s still dark outside, and his heart is hammering from what he had seen in his dream. He was back in Kinloch Hold, the image of desire demons imitating and mocking his fantasies playing out in his dreams, like they had so often before. His throat is closed off but his cock is hard, pounding and begging for release as the head drags against the fabric of the duvet. Evelyn’s body is so close and warm on the other side of the bed, her back turned towards Cullen. He can see the outline of her in the moonlight coming in from inside, her hips clearly showing even when she lies beneath the thick covering. 

He reaches out for her, his fingers dragging over her back and down to her ass, slipping between her legs. She’s still wet from when he had made her come before, his fingers drenched the second he parts the folds of her pussy. He slides behind her, kissing her neck in an attempt to wake her up as he presses his cock between her thighs, the tip of it nudging against her hole already.

“Eve,” he whispers, his hand coming to the front of her body to grasp her tits, “Evie…” 

“Hmm?” She wakes up slowly, gasping when he twists her nipple. “Cullen?” Her voice is still sleepy as she presses her ass against his crotch. 

“I want you,” he rasps into her ear, groaning when he feels her nod. He pushes onto her back until she’s lying on her front, then he gets on top of her. His chest is pressed against her back as he presses inside, one hand in her hair, the other on her hip. He fucks into her quickly, his cock surrounded by hot wetness - it feels so good, being inside her. So much better than ignoring his erection when he wakes up from his dreams, too ashamed to do anything about it. He wonders if her magic had triggered these violent memories of Kinloch Hold, the last time magic had been used on his body in a sexual way. 

“Oh, _ shit _ ,” Evelyn breathes out as he thrusts into her, her nails digging into the pillow her head rests on. It’s so rare that she swears, it spurns Cullen on even more, desperate sounds escaping him as he pushes himself into her, again and again. It’s over almost as soon as it began, and he pulls out to come all over her cunt, messing her and the sheets in the progress.

He’s covered in cold sweat when he rolls off her, grabbing her and pulling her against him. He’s never done something like this - taken someone so violently, without properly making sure they were enjoying themselves. 

“Evie, oh Maker,” he breathes out, still panting. “I’m sorry.”

“Shh,” Evelyn shushes him, her lips finding his in the dark. “It’s alright.”

“I shouldn’t have-” She kisses him again, resting her hand against his cheek.

“What happened?” she whispers when their lips part. “You had a dream?”

Cullen nods, a knot forming between his eyebrows when he tries to recall specifics, the dream already slipping from his mind. “I was back… back in Ferelden. Back in the tower.” 

Evelyn is quiet, only nods. Cullen feels exhausted and cold, though he’s still sweating. The sheets will be drenched by the morning if this continues, but he’s too tired to get up to clean himself. Evelyn presses soft kisses against his forehead, and then there’s the soft glow of green healing magic from her hands as she strokes over his body, easing some of the tension in his muscles. 

“Does this happen often?”

“I normally don’t sleep next to beautiful women, so. No.” Cullen can hear he sounds like a petulant child, but he’s not in the mood to discuss this right now. Fleeting images of horns and purple skin still flash before his eyes, the high ceiling of the room he’s trapped in so far out of reach. He presses his eyes closed, forcing himself to remember. Skyhold, not Kinloch. 

“All right.” Evelyn seems to understand his hesitation to talk about it. “Another time, then.”

“Another time,” Cullen promises, knowing fully well he would never tell her unless pressed for details. He kisses her forehead, his stomach still in knots as he tries to fall back asleep, but he’s shivering too hard for that, his mind full of wicked thoughts. 

He’ll be more tired than usual tomorrow. Maybe Michel could take over training the recruits, and he could stay in bed a little bit longer. With Evelyn this time, do what she wants to do. 

Yes. He’ll do what she wants - she knows better than him what’s good for him, anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://mikelaidlaw.tumblr.com
> 
> i appreciate everyone who's given kudos, commented, liked and reblogged this fic on tumblr. thank you so much <3


	3. (Bridge)

Evelyn spends a few days in Val Royeaux, with Vivienne, Dorian, and Josephine, leaving Cullen behind in Skyhold. She knows he’s secretly glad she hadn’t dragged him along and instead had opted for the more fashion-forward of her friends - the ones that would actually enjoy their stay, and not covertly complain about shopping trips or going to the theatre. Cullen had shown his disdain for Orlesian culture the second they had stepped foot across the border, the only time his face hadn’t been stuck in grimace the few minutes they had spent alone on the balcony in Halamshiral.

She had extended an invitation to Michel, but he had gracefully declined her offer and insisted that Cullen needed his presence at Skyhold more than Evelyn needed it in Val Royeaux. Evelyn thinks he might just not want to step foot somewhere the people could recognise him as Empress Celene’s former Champion, but she didn’t call him out on it. She’ll have Vivienne and Josephine should any language problems occur.

“My dear, your wardrobe is dreadfully lacking,” Vivienne bemoans as she watches Evelyn unpack her bags in the room they had rented. “It’s a good thing you took me with you. Cullen will thank me when you return.”

“I don’t think Cullen cares much about what I wear unless it’s not enough armour,” Evelyn chuckles tiredly, remembering his disapproving glares every time she would leave Skyhold in only her mage robes.

“Oh, he’ll notice what you’re _not_ wearing,” Vivienne says, smiling slyly. “Val Royeaux has the finest assortment of tailors when it comes to boudoir fashion.”

Evelyn raises her eyebrow at Vivienne, a little shocked. While she might be one of her closest friends in her inner circle, they hadn’t spent much time discussing Evelyn’s relationship with Cullen before - Evelyn had suspected that Vivienne and Cullen didn’t get along and only suffered each other's presence for her benefit.

“I don’t think Cullen is the kind of man to take a pretty corset over… just my naked body.”

“Then you’ll have to make him appreciate it,” Vivienne is still smiling at her. “Make him enjoy the finer things in life. Maker knows he could use a female influence opening his eyes.”

Evelyn snorts. “You don’t approve of his fashion choices?”

“His armour certainly makes a statement. But he must know how handsome he looked in the uniform at the Winter Palace. He was moaning so much about having to wear tight trousers, one would think it would kill him.” Evelyn watches as Vivienne shakes her head, seemingly flabbergasted by the prospect of someone not caring about their appearance.

“Cullen knows he’s handsome,” she says, biting her lip to keep herself from smiling. “He just… doesn’t understand fashion. He wore the Templar robes for the majority of his life, he’s not used to having choices.” She remembers how lazy her brother had gotten after starting to work for the Order, his already low interest in Ostwick fashion dwindling even more. Their mother had tried her best to keep him looking sharp whenever he was home from the Circle, but there had been no getting Maxwell into finery.

  
Evelyn hadn’t minded. It only meant that their parents would spend more coin on buying dresses for her.

“Well, we’re here to dress you, not your Templar.”

“Actually, we’re here because I have to help out Josephine in some personal matters,” Evelyn laughs. “Also, he’s not a Templar anymore.”

“Once a Templar, always a Templar. You can’t be sure he won’t run off to rejoin once all this madness settles.”

Evelyn bites the inside of her cheek, trying to bite back a reply. She doesn’t like fighting with Vivienne, mostly because she always loses, but also because she values her friendship too much to start a row over something so insignificant. Vivienne doesn’t know about Cullen stopping lyrium or the horrors he’s faced in his time in the Order - to her, he’s just a Templar, like any other.

“I’m sure because he loves me,” Evelyn says after a few seconds. “He can’t be with me if he goes back to being Knight-Commander.” She looks up and sees Vivienne look at her, her sly smile replaced with a kind expression, her eyes locked on Evelyn’s.

“I sure hope so, my dear. You deserve a bit of happiness.”

 

“Maker, Vivienne,” Evelyn says, her face turning red as she looks around the shop they’re standing in. “Is this the kind of thing you used to do for Bastien?”

There’s rows and rows of expensive materials, paintings of women in lingerie on the walls, and a few exhibition pieces dressing up mannequins. Evelyn has never been prude - she’s had many men and a few women before Cullen, but never had she made a show of her underclothes. It had seemed so terribly Orlesian, she had never dared going into town and commissioning any of the racy underwear that Vivienne is apparently a fan of.

“That and much more,” Vivienne laughs. “I don’t have the title of _Madame_ for just any reason.”

Evelyn bites her lip, pondering her next few sentences. She’s well aware of people’s bedroom activities at Skyhold, knowing practically any time one of her friends gets lucky, but she tries not to spend too much time thinking about the sex lives of her closest friends. Vivienne had been an enigma to her - she must have been exciting, if Bastien had kept her as his mistress for this long, and there was clearly a dominant streak in the woman, just like in Evelyn herself.

“So you… took care of his needs, I assume?” Evelyn tries, keeping her words vague enough.

“Aren’t you just adorable?” Vivienne asks as she runs her hand over black lace, testing out the quality before motioning to the seamstress that this material would do. “Yes, Bastien was very appreciative of when I took control.”

Evelyn licks over her lips, the memory of Cullen beneath her with his hands pinned beneath his head playing out in front of her eyes. She had liked him like that - unable to move, whimpering beneath her as she did to him what she wanted. She’s had brief encounters with men who liked that sort of thing in Ostwick, but most of the time it had been _her_ with her hands tied to the bedposts. She had never thought about doing that sort of thing to a man.

“He liked it?” Evelyn asks, wanting to make sure.

“Darling, if you want my opinion on if your dear Commander would like the same thing, I can only give an educated guess.”

“And what is your opinion on the matter?”

Vivienne pauses for a few seconds, her back turned towards Evelyn as she watches the seamstress measure the cloth that will become Evelyn’s nightgown. “I do think he might… enjoy a strong-willed woman who is not afraid to take control.”

Evelyn nods, a blush forming on her cheeks and her ears turning red. “I think so, too.”

 

They arrive back at Skyhold earlier than expected. Evelyn’s belongings are being carried up by a few servants, her bags with her old clothes, and elegant looking boxes filled with the new things Vivienne had helped her pick out. There are a few bottles of good Orlesian wine as well, that will be stored in her room instead of with the others beneath the kitchen, where everyone could go and snatch them. No, these bottles were reserved for her and Cullen, only.

She checks Cullen’s office when she doesn’t find him in their bedroom, but he’s nowhere to be found. It’s late at night, so there’s no training going on in the courtyard except for a few newer recruits who are still training to catch up with the other soldiers. There are no meetings scheduled in for the war room either, so the last place Cullen could be is in the Herald’s Rest, together with everyone else who wanted a bit of company and a mug of ale before going to bed. It surprises Evelyn, that Cullen would go there – he isn’t the most outgoing person, and it takes convincing to get him to agree to visit a social gathering.

 

Before checking there, although, Evelyn takes a quick bath to rinse herself off the dirt that came with traveling, before slipping into one pair of underwear that is positively scandalous with how much skin it showed. The bottom is white lace with almost see through material over her crotch, while the breast band is more for show than for actual support of her chest. Vivienne had complimented her on how nice her tan skin had looked in contrast with the stark white of the lace, which had ultimately convinced her to buy them, even though they seem more fit to be worn below a wedding dress. Still, she doesn’t think Cullen would think them as too bridal once she got out of her dress and his attention was taken up by her breasts and bum. 

When she finds him, Cullen is sitting with Michel and Rylen, who had returned to Skyhold for a few weeks to prepare the march on the Arbor Wilds with Cullen. Cassandra is sitting there as well, eagerly listening as Cullen tells a story, occasionally smiling when Cullen gesticulates with his hands. She shouldn’t, but Evelyn feels a sharp pang of possessiveness. It’s obvious that Cassandra isn’t interested in Cullen in that way, that he would not be cut out for her fantasies of a grand romance, but Evelyn still wants to run over to the table and push Cassandra away, put her in her place and establish herself as the woman in Cullen’s life.

She opts to get herself an ale and squish herself between the two warriors, instead.

“Evelyn! I didn’t know you’d be back today.” Cullen seems surprised to see her in the tavern, even though it is his presence that is uncommon. He hasn’t been seen mingling since coming to Skyhold, and Evelyn bites her lip from commenting on it. She had tried often enough to get him to spend an evening with her and the others in the Herald’s Rest, but apparently it's not _her_ presence that finally convinced him.

“We left a day earlier,” she explains, keeping her voice neutral, but leaning into Cullen to show him that she’s expecting a kiss. He looks a little awkward as his eyes dart around the room before leaning down to press a chaste kiss against her lips, pulling back almost as soon as their lips touch. Evelyn wants to know what's gotten into him - he had never been shy about kissing her on the battlements before, but certainly _someone’s_ presence is bothering him. “Weird to see you down here,” she comments instead, raising an eyebrow.

“Rylen convinced me that my soldiers would appreciate seeing me as a _person._ ” Cullen smiles and shakes his head. “I think they’re happy when they _don’t_ have to see me.”

“Can’t you just enjoy one night of drinking without making a scene of it?” Rylen asks from the opposite side of the table, clearly a few rounds in already. “I don’t see what you like about him,” he continues, turning to Evelyn. “He’s happiest when he can sit in a corner, like a loner.”

“He’s not that bad,” Evelyn laughs, forced, resting her hand on Cullen’s thigh. “The positive aspects outweigh the negative.”

Rylen snorts, but she can feel Cullen tense next to her, though she isn’t bothered enough to apologise for her comment. She drinks her ale, a few swigs that are way too big for someone of her statue - she’s never been good at holding her liquor, and the swill Cabot serves is stronger than what she usually prefers. Cullen seems to like it though, and she more often than not drinks this instead of wine now, when she doesn’t feel like drinking a bottle by herself while Cullen watches her get progressively sloppier.

Cullen continues his conversation with Cassandra, talking over her head as if she isn’t there while Evelyn tries to focus on the conversation between Rylen and Michel. Most of it goes over her head, the two men talking about sword techniques. While her training as a knight-enchanter had given her some pointers on how to swing a spirit blade, she still isn’t very interested on how to correctly grip an actual one made of metal. She occasionally watches the sparring matches in the courtyard, but only when trying to escape her paper work.

“I’ll get another drink,” she says to no one in particular before standing up and walking over to the bar. Wine, this time, because Cullen clearly isn’t bothered to pay enough attention to what she is drinking. 

The air of the Herald’s Rest stinks of sweat and alcohol, the doors and window closed to keep the chill out. It’s loud to the point of being obnoxious, and Evelyn asks herself why she is subjecting herself to staying here when she’s in such a bad mood - though going to bed alone doesn’t seem much better. She had hoped Cullen and her would leave after just a few minutes of polite chit-chat before leaving for her quarters where she could show him what’s beneath her dress, but he’s shown no signs of wanting to leave yet.

Cabot serves her a bottle and a glass, and Evelyn smiles politely before throwing him a few silver and turning back to the table, where Cullen and Cassandra had already scooted closer together again. Cassandra is drawing on a napkin with her finger, trying to explain something to him, and Evelyn has to stop herself from rolling her eyes. _Warriors_ , she thinks, _always thinking about the next battle._

There’s still the bitter after-taste of knowing that Cassandra had been successful in coaxing Cullen into the tavern, but Evelyn knows how childish it would be to start a fight with her now. She doesn’t want to have to spend days talking about her jealousy issues with Cullen before he would consider having sex with her again – he’s like that, having to get over fights before he’s able to be intimate with her. For all Evelyn knows, this is the way all relationships are – she doesn’t exactly have a lot of experience with seeing the same person for longer than just a few weeks. Ostwick Circle had been small, and there hadn’t been any interesting men and only a few girls her age, much less of them even interested in women, so the only time she had a chance to go out and have fun was on the weekends, when she was allowed into the care of her family.

Shaking herself, she stalks on over back to their table, and sits down next to Cullen, leaving him to be in the middle this time. If he’s so intent on having a conversation with Cassandra with her here – well, she’ll complain about it later. Probably to Dorian.

“So, Michel, how do you like Skyhold? Better than the Emprise?” She winks at him, and Michel laughs.

“Not quite as much snow, if I may remark. It’s almost like a holiday. Though still cold at night.”

“I bet you can find someone to warm your bed.” Evelyn laughs – the laugh she’s learned when dealing with nobles, putting on a play. She likes Michel, thinks he’s a great man, but right now she’s only doing this to annoy Cullen.

“I should be so lucky,” Michel says slyly, his eyes darting between Cullen and Evelyn. Evelyn grins. He knows exactly what she’s doing. “Not everyone can be as blessed as the Commander.”

“What?” Cullen looks at them, confused. He had clearly only heard the tail end of their conversation.

“Nothing.” Michel waves him off. “I only said you’re lucky to have someone as gorgeous as Lady Trevelyan in your bed every night.”

“Technically, I’ve got him in _my_ bed,” Evelyn remarks, raising her eyebrows. “How about you, Rylen? Missing the Western Approach?”

“Not missing all the sand, if that’s what you mean,” Rylen says dryly. “I agree with Michel here – you have it good at Skyhold, with all the mages keeping the ice away from the courtyards. I should request some to be sent to the Approach, we could use the snow you don’t want here.”

“I’m sad to inform you that our mages are needed here more – not that your request for weather fairies won’t be thoroughly considered before we deny It,” Evelyn says, and Rylen laughs.

“Fair enough, Inquisitor.”

Cullen is still looking at them with an expression as if he’d bitten into a sour apple, annoyed that they aren’t explaining themselves to him. He shrugs his shoulders after a few seconds, then turns around to Cassandra, but Evelyn can feel the tenseness in his body where her arm is resting against his.

“Have you ever been with a mage?” Evelyn asks Rylen, loud enough so everyone at the table can hear, but quiet enough that it gets lost in the noise of the tavern.

“I haven’t had the pleasure,” Rylen shake his head and smiles. “I was a very… _dutiful_ Templar.”

  
“I’m sure we can do something about that.”

“All right,” Cullen’s voice comes from her side, “I think we should go to bed now.” He takes away her wine glass and finishes it off himself, nodding at Michel and Rylen before getting up from the bench and helping Evelyn up as well. She waves good-bye to everyone at the table before they leave, her arm wrapped around Cullen’s. When they step out of the tavern and into the chilly night air, she presses herself even closer to him.

“Finally,” she whispers as she pulls on Cullen’s sleeve to slow him down. “I thought I was going to have to stick my tongue down Rylen’s throat before you would do something about it.”

Cullen looks dumbstruck for a few seconds before he furrows his brows. “You planned this?”

“It’s like you don’t even know me.” Evelyn clicks her tongue and shakes her head, stepping backwards while keeping her grip on Cullen. She pulls him behind the Herald’s Rest, leaning against the wall before she pulls him down by his collar and presses her lips against his, finally stealing the kiss she’s wanted for hours. Cullen gasps into her mouth as she sneaks her tongue inside his, his hands coming to rest on her waist.

“You should have just told me you wanted to leave.”

Evelyn rolls her eyes and leans her head against the stone behind her. “Isn’t it obvious that I want to spend time alone with you when I come back?” She sneaks her hand beneath Cullen’s shirt, reaching up to his chest to rake her fingers through his chest hair and scratch over his nipples. Cullen gasps and presses himself closer against her, before remembering where they are.

“We should go up to your room.”

“I’m pretty comfortable here.” Evelyn shrugs and smiles up at him before pressing against his torso, making them switch positions so Cullen is the one pressed against the wall of the Herald’s Rest. She gets on her knees quickly, looking around to make sure they are alone, before she pulls down Cullen’s breeches and underwear, taking out his still soft cock.

  
“Eve, we shouldn’t do this here-“ the rest of Cullen’s sentence gets lost in a groan when Evelyn takes his cock into her mouth, her teeth grazing over the sensitive skin like she knows he likes. His hands stroke through her hair while his cock fills inside her mouth, getting harder with each swipe of her tongue. Evelyn closes her eyes as she bobs her head, breathing in with each pull back – she’s missed the musky scent she’s gotten used to whenever her head’s between Cullen’s legs. She reaches up to wrap her fingers around Cullen’s wrists, and then pins his hands to the wall, pointedly pressing them against the stone a bit harder than she needs to, to show him that he needs to keep them there. Cullen whines in the back of his throat, but complies.

“Evie…” he groans, and Evelyn can hear his fingernails scratching over stone, “someone’s going to see us.”

“I don’t care,” Evelyn pants as she pulls of his shaft, spit mixed with pre-come on her lips and chin. “It’s not a secret, we talked about this before.”  
  
“There’s a difference between them knowing we have sex, and them _knowing_ we have sex.”

Evelyn rolls her eyes and takes his cock back in her mouth, wrapping one hand around it and placing the other on his balls, gripping them in a circle between her thumb and index finger. Cullen groans at the pain she inflicts on him, his legs trembling and fingers twitching as he wants to reach down and pull her off his balls. She doesn’t stop as he yelps out in pain, pulling his sack down slightly, listening to Cullen’s groans of pain while his cock twitches inside her mouth.

He can pretend not to like it, but his cock is harder than ever.

She pulls off him with a pop, jerking him with her hand while she runs her tongue over his balls. Then, in a fit of bravery, she angles her head so her tongue can reach behind his balls and lick over his perineum, and then his hole.

“Evelyn!” Cullen whisper-shouts, trying to clamp his legs together, “what in the _Maker’s_ name-“

“I like it when you do it for me,” Evelyn says, raising her eyebrows. “It feels good.” Cullen might have only done it to her after a lot of gentle coaxing, but she had gotten him used to touching her ass, licking over her hole, and putting his fingers inside. She’s only succeeded in getting him to fuck her ass once, but he’d enjoyed it – even though he had been red-faced and embarrassed the whole time.

“Don’t do it on me,” he says, blushing from the tip of his ears down to his chest. “It’s… different.”

“Because you’re a man?” Evelyn asks, then laughs. “It’s not just for women and gay men, you know. You can enjoy it, too.”

Cullen sighs impatiently when she sticks her tongue out again, pushing it against his tight pucker. She’ll get nowhere like this tonight, she knows – Cullen is too scared somebody would see them to relax enough to let her tongue pass. Evelyn licks over her finger instead before taking his member back into her mouth, stroking over his hole, careful to not scratch him with her nails.

She almost bites down when she hears the door to the Herald’s Rest slam shut, and then footsteps coming their way. Cullen’s hands go from the wall to her head, grabbing her and turning them so his back is facing the corner of the building, shielding his crotch and Evelyn should the person come around. Evelyn can feel Cullen’s pulse through his cock, still in her mouth. She almost laughs when she hears a man sigh, and then liquid hitting the wall of the tavern. Just a soldier coming out to take a piss, then.

“Oh shit!” she hears him say, closer than she thought he was, and- she knows that voice.  
  
“Blackwall,” Cullen says, trying to keep his voice calm. “There are latrines, you know.”

“Sorry Commander, but I don’t think you’re in any position to talk about appropriate locations right now. Good evening, Inquisitor. Didn’t know you’d be back today.”

“It was an unexpected change of plans,” Evelyn says when Cullen lets go of her head and she can finally pull back, letting his cock fall out of her mouth. “I missed Cullen.”

“I can see,” Blackwall laughs, and Evelyn looks up at Cullen, who looks like he’d rather be anywhere but here. She bites her lip to keep herself from laughing as well, and instead rests her head against Cullen’s thigh.

“Well, I’m finished here,” Blackwall says as he laces up his pants, “don’t let me keep you from greeting each other.”

“We’re quite done here as well,” Cullen says, looking down at Evelyn disapprovingly. She shrugs and gets up, nodding at Blackwall before he turns around and walks back into the tavern. Cullen buttons is breeches back up before they make their way into the main hall, and into Evelyn’s quarters from there.

There’s a fire already going in her room, the air too hot to comfortably stay in there. Evelyn opens the balcony doors to let in a breeze, shuddering as it blows across her skin. It feels good though, after being in a stuffy tavern for so long, and she takes a few deep breaths before turning back around and walking over to the middle of the room.

“I’ve got something to show you,” Evelyn whispers as she pushes Cullen onto the bed, shaking off his hands when he tries to pull her down with her. “Watch this,” she says, a sly smile pulling at her lips as she unbuttons the dress she’s wearing. Cullen leans back on the bed, pressing his lips together as he watches her undress, the cloth falling to the floor and exposing the white lingerie beneath it. Evelyn lets her fingers trail down her breasts and stomach, resting them just above her underwear. “Do you like it?”

Cullen reaches out to trail his fingers over the fine lace, softly, as if he’s afraid he’d break it. He licks his lips and opens his mouth as if to speak, but he closes them again before he can make any sound. Evelyn’s heart beats wildly in her chest as she waits for a reaction, placing her hands over Cullen’s as he rests them on her hips.

“Do you?”

Cullen smiles up at her, then looks back down at her chest and crotch. “It looks… very expensive. Finely made.”

“I got it in Val Royeaux.”

“Inquisition funds well spent?” Cullen jokes, grinning as Evelyn crosses her arms in front of her chest.

“I bought it with my own money.” He raises an eyebrow at her, as if to say _‘from what job?’_ “My family’s money. You remember, my noble family from Ostwick, who loves me very much and wants me to marry a nice, noble boy?”

“Oh, I remember,” Cullen says. “I’m sure they’ll be overjoyed when you bring a Fereldan farm boy with you instead.”

“You know I didn’t mean it like that.” Evelyn knows she sounds petulant, that she’s close to throwing a temper tantrum like a child. But somehow, Cullen always manages to make her feel like a spoiled brat, even if she knows that she earns the Inquisition enough money to excuse her occasional spending – she went to the Winter Palace in the uniform issues by Josephine, even though she thought it looked awful on her, and that she would have looked better in a dress. She had listened to Josie’s lecture on uniformity, on sending a message by not wearing a mask and thereby showing they were above politics, even though Evelyn had been looking at masks for weeks, excited to finally fit in with the nobles.

“I can bring it back if you don’t like it,” she says, stepping out of Cullen’s grasp and picking up her dress to drape it across the sofa.

“It’s your underwear, Evelyn. I don’t have to like it,” Cullen says, his tone bewildered. “And I do like it – I just think… It’s a bit much, isn’t it?”

“If you think so,” Evelyn says, stripping it off and placing it next to the dress. She walks over to the bed naked, waving her hand to extinguish the candles set up around her room, the furnace now the only light in the room. She crawls into bed naked, lying on her side and closing her eyes to sleep before Cullen has even taken off his boots.

She can hear him sigh as he undresses, and then feels the sheets shifting as he gets into bed next to her. They’re both too worked up to actually sleep, and Evelyn knows it’s only a question of time before one of them will blow up on the other – she is biting back her words already, not wanting to be the first one to talk. She listens as Cullen turns onto his side, facing her, then onto his back with his head turned towards her. She stays lying on her side, her back turned to him.

“Eve,” Cullen says after a while, reaching out and trailing his fingers down her back. “I think the underwear is nice. I don’t know enough about fashion to judge it, but the colour looks nice against your skin, and I think it makes your chest look amazing. But I’d rather see you naked.”

Evelyn sighs, relaxing into the mattress and Cullen’s touch. “Vivienne convinced me to buy it. I have four additional pairs. I knew you wouldn’t like them.” She begins doubting Vivienne’s other opinions given that day – that Cullen might like her taking charge. She can see it so well, Vivienne taking power and reducing her partners to a whimpering mess, but when she tries seeing Cullen in that role – he might like a bit of pain and her on top, but that doesn’t mean he’d appreciate her tying him up and making him beg.

“I’ve always wanted to wear fancy Orlesian things,” Evelyn says, scooting back on the mattress until Cullen’s chest meets her back. He wraps an arm around her body, placing his hand just beneath her breasts. “They forced us to wear those ugly robes in the Circle, so the only time I was allowed to wear nice things was on the weekends, when I was with my family. And my mother never allowed me to buy things like this.”

Cullen chuckles, then presses a kiss against Evelyn’s neck. “Well, now you get to do all the things your mother would disapprove of. Including a Templar.”

“Oh, she would have _loved_ if I was normal and married a Templar,” Evelyn says. “My family is very religious – they practically bullied the youngest of my brothers into joining the Order. She might even overlook that you’re not from a noble family, if you had continued serving as Knight-Commander in Kirkwall.

“Really?” Cullen asks, surprised. He knows little about the Trevelyans, only bits and pieces Evelyn has told him over the few months they’ve known each other. He knows she has four older brothers, and that she’s the closest to Maxwell, who had been a Templar in the Ostwick Circle before the Order broke away from the Chantry and the mages rebelled. As far as he knows, Maxwell was now staying in Ostwick, having chosen to not venture to Therinfal Redoubt. “So I might not be such a big disappointment after all.”

“No,” Evelyn sighs, turning in Cullen’s arms and pressing her face against his chest. “You’d charm them with how Fereldan you are, and with the fact that you lived in the Free Marches for over a decade.”

“Close to a decade.”

“Long enough to be sick of Starkhaven Fish Pie.”

Cullen laughs. “Is that also popular in Ostwick?”

“We’re a sea side city – fish is all we eat.” Evelyn pulls a face. “I used to rejoice when we got something non-fishy for dinner. I’m pretty sure that’s why the Ostwick Circle rebelled, in the first place.”

“Of course.”

Evelyn smiles, feeling her body growing heavy with exhaustion from a day’s travel. She’ll give herself some more time to decide how to approach the idea of making Cullen submit to her – she’ll have to find a better way of just springing it on him in the heat of the moment, like she had done with her tongue in his ass. She feels hot at the very idea of Cullen on his knees in front of her, maybe with his hands tied and his eyes covered, waiting for her to order him around.

She doesn’t want to mess this up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...this was originally supposed to be chapter 3, but apparently I had a lot to say, so have this as a bridge before the official Chapter 3. Reviews and kudos and reblogs on tumblr feed my family.


	4. I’ll Be The Weaker

Evelyn is up to something, Cullen knows as much.

Their reunion had been soured by their fight, and he had disappointed Evelyn with his reaction to the lacy underthings she had bought while in Orlais, but he couldn’t lie to her – he doesn’t care for things like that. He’d been perfectly fine with what she’d been wearing before, the smallclothes that had been comfortable for her and had looked nice enough when he was undressing her. He knows she likes to be fancy sometimes, buying perfume bottles and dousing herself in the scent of roses, collecting dresses she has no occasion for wearing, and he understands, up to a point. She was the daughter of a noble, who never had the chance to take part in that role – it’s her time to catch up.

He supposes he should be doing the same thing. He went into this relationship knowing fully well that there would be conflict, not only because of his former position within the Templars, but also because of the different worlds they’re accustomed to. While the Circle had humbled her, it hadn’t made her into a commoner.

“Lost in thought?” Evelyn’s asks from where she’s lying on her couch, a half-drunken bottle of wine and a glass standing on the ground next to her head. She’s wearing a simple shift and nothing beneath, her hair still wet from the bath they had taken earlier. A tub big enough for two people had been commissioned by her early into their relationship, and Cullen almost isn’t embarrassed anymore when the servants bring up buckets full of water. Almost.

“Just enjoying the view.” Cullen smiles at her. He’s clad in only loose breeches himself, standing leaned against the wall next to the open balcony door.

“You’ve seen it all already, I’m afraid. There’s nothing new to show you.” Evelyn teases the tie around her waist loose, then widens the cloth so Cullen can see more of the swell of her breasts. His cock twitches – he’d been hard the whole time they’d been bathing, with Evelyn stroking over his erection every few minutes, making sure he’d stay hard and wanting for her. It had been agonising, but he’d behaved and not just taken her right then and there, spilling soapy water all over the floor of their quarters.

“And still it’s exciting when you show it to me,” he murmurs, putting his wine glass on the desk that stands in the corner of the room before walking over to where Evelyn is lounging and crouching down in front of her.

Evelyn closes her eyes and undoes the knot completely. She opens the front of the shift, showing off her naked body, only her arms covered by the white, fluffy robe. Cullen gets on his knees and kisses her abdomen before he lets his tongue trail to her breasts, pressing his face in the cleft between them. Evelyn chuckles as he nuzzles her, sighing softly at the feeling of his face being pillowed by her chest.

“Nice, hm?”

Cullen smiles and hums, lazily blinking up at her. She looks younger, relaxed like this – he’s used to seeing her face set hard when pondering their next move in front of the war table, little lines forming on her forehead from stress. He knows he’s sporting the same sort of wrinkles on his forehead and around his eyes. They had appeared early in his twenties, and only deepened when he took over what was left of Kirkwall’s Templars after Meredith’s fall.

“You’re beautiful,” Cullen whispers, then leans forward to kiss Evelyn, licking over her lips until she parts them and lets his tongue inside. His cock jerks inside his trousers, and he sneaks one hand to his crotch to unfasten the ties that kept them on his hips. It relieves him of some of the uncomfortable pressure against his erection, and he groans when the head brushes against the edge of the couch Evelyn is lying on.

 

He backs off after a few seconds, scooting farther down, so he’s kneeling in front of Evelyn’s groin. He lifts one leg so it’s draped around his back before he leans down and licks over her slit, making sure to let his tongue linger on her clit for a while, rubbing small circles over it.

“How about we go to bed?” Cullen asks, giving Evelyn his sweetest smile as he reaches back down to stroke over his cock.

“I quite like it here,” she says, giving him a challenging look. Cullen suppresses the urge to roll his eyes, then leans back down to slide his tongue into Evelyn, making her writhe beneath him as she groans out in pleasure. She still smells of the bath water instead of the heavy scent he’s used to, but Cullen knows he can get her soaking wet in just a few minutes, using only his mouth.

He yelps when, suddenly, Evelyn is sitting up, pressing Cullen’s head into the couch and turning him so that he’s sitting on his ass, his back leaning against the couch, head in his neck so he’s looking up at the ceiling. Moments later, Evelyn sits on his face, and Cullen groans at the newness of the position. They’ve only done this in beds so far, after that first failed attempt in his office.

“Am I hurting you?” Evelyn asks, unsure if his moan had been one of pleasure or pain. Cullen shakes his head as best as he can, wedged between her thighs as he is, and then Evelyn lowers herself onto his face, placing her pussy in front of his mouth, his nose pressed into the pubic hair on her mound. Cullen’s hands drift down to his cock, stroking himself as he licks over her clit, and he moans at the same time as her when Evelyn starts grinding her hips down onto him.

“Good boy,” Evelyn whispers, and Cullen can hear the grin in her voice. He loudly breathes out a sigh against her, gripping his cock tighter and jerking himself, stopping on every stroke up to run his thumb over the tip and spread his pre-come down his shaft. He feels himself jerking as he presses his tongue back inside Evelyn, wishing they were in a position where he could push his fingers inside and feel her clench around him. “You know what happens when you’re good to me?”

“Hm?” Cullen asks, opening his eyes to look up at Evelyn, but all he can see is her abdomen and her tits, and brown hair starting to curl as it dries.

“You get a treat.”

Cullen squeezes the base of his cock before rubbing over his balls, which are already tightly drawn up against his body. He’ll get himself too worked up if he keeps stroking himself, and the mysterious promise of a treat makes him curious – he wonders what she has in store for him. He concentrates on her clit, kissing over it and feeling it with his lips before he rubs over it with his tongue again, pressing against it hard and flicking it up and down. Evelyn tangles her fingers in his hair, pulling and pushing him into the direction she wants his tongue to go until he feels her legs shake, and she has to hold herself up on the back of the couch.

She groans out her orgasm quietly, letting Cullen lick her a few times afterwards to bring her down gently, before she slides off the couch and onto his lap, teasing his cock against her pussy. Cullen’s neck cracks when he lifts his head to look down at where she has her hand wrapped around his cock, and he pulls his hands away from his balls, a little embarrassed.

“So, what’s my treat?” he asks, licking her taste off his lips as she teases the head of his cock inside her. Evelyn raises her eyebrows at him, then stands up, leaving Cullen sitting on the floor, perplexed at the sudden loss of her in his arms. “Eve?”

“Lie on your front, on the bed,” she orders as she walks over to the little wardrobe close to her bed, rummaging through one of the drawers. Cullen is curious as to what she’s searching for, but he makes his way over to the bed, pushing down his trousers before crawling in the middle and lying on his stomach, his arms crossed beneath his head. He watches as Evelyn pulls out a vial and makes her way over to their bed, climbing on top of Cullen and settling herself on the small of his back. He groans as it presses his cock into the mattress, shifting his hips so he’s in a more comfortable position.

Evelyn uncorks the vial and lets a few drops of its contents spill onto his back – it’s oil, smelling faintly of vanilla, and it’s a little cold on his heated skin. Evelyn coats her hands in the oil before she sets it down next to the bed, then begins rubbing circles onto Cullen’s back, beginning at his shoulders. He sighs when she heats the oil with her magic, letting it seep into his skin and relax his muscles.

“How nice of you,” Cullen murmurs as Evelyn trails her hands down his body, “you get that oil in Val Royeaux as well?”

“Yes, upon recommendation from Dorian,” Evelyn answers. “Apparently that’s the one he uses as well.”

“Who’s rubbing Dorian’s back?” Cullen asks, confused. Realisation dawns upon him when Evelyn starts laughing, and then pats his back.

“I’m not so sure about massages, but I could tell you who uses the oil on him in… other ways.”

“That won’t be necessary.”

“You never were one for gossip.”

Evelyn continues kneading his muscles, and Cullen knows he’s still smiling at his question. He always seems to make a fool of himself in front of her, especially in the bedroom – she’s more experienced, and even though she has been showing him a great deal, there are still some things that make his ears blush. Like the day she had come back and had shoved her tongue… Cullen bites his lip when he thinks about it. He hadn’t been sure if he had liked it or not, the feeling to new and foreign to form an opinion in just a few seconds before they had been interrupted. He’d done it to Evelyn before after she had asked for it, tentatively letting his tongue trail lower until he was licking her… there.

He hadn’t minded it as much as he thought he would – Evelyn is good with personal hygiene, and the noises she had made when he had pushed a finger inside her had broken all his previous inhibitions.

Cullen turns his face into the pillow when Evelyn scoots farther down his body, settling on his thighs. Her hands are on his ass now, massaging his cheeks, and occasionally spreading them apart. Cullen knows she wants to try again, get him to enjoy her tongue, but he’s not sure he’s open-minded enough to let go of the thought that he shouldn’t enjoy this.

To his surprise, when Evelyn leans down it’s not to kiss him there, but to retrieve the oil vial standing next to the bed. She uncorks it again and lets more dribble onto the small of his back, rubbing it into his skin.  Then she drags her nails down from his shoulders to just above his arse, leaving red, angry marks on his skin. Cullen groans and arches his back, relaxing into the familiar feeling of the burn her nails leave behind. He tenses up again when her finger travels down his crack, spreading the warmed-up oil there, and rubbing it onto his hole.

“This all right?”

“Uh,” Cullen grunts, then chuckles in embarrassment.

“I promise it feels nice.”

Cullen nods into the pillow, trying to relax as Evelyn slowly pushes the first digit of her index finger into him. His cock is still half-hard, his erection having gone soft during the massage, but not disappearing. It certainly reacts to Evelyn touching him like this, a pulsing sensation starting up as she presses inside.

Cullen yelps when Evelyn leans down and licks around her finger, the tip of her tongue soft where her finger is hard. He presses his face farther into the pillow to hide his whimpers as his cock fills back up with blood, hard and heavy between his legs where it presses into the mattress. Evelyn’s finger is completely inside him now, and the stretch doesn’t hurt as much as it just feels strange and a little too intimate.

“Oh, stop, please, pause,” he croaks out when Evelyn attempts to push in a second finger. “It feels… too much.”

“All right,” Evelyn mumbles, soothing him with her tongue, “but I’m sure you can take more.”

“You think?” Cullen’s voice breaks as he asks.

“Get on your knees.”

His face burns as he complies, aware of his cock, completely hard, hanging between his legs. He groans when Evelyn wraps her free hand around it, jerking him off while still pushing her finger into him and licking over his hole – there are so many sensations, he can’t decide what to focus on. He feels exposed like this, on his knees with his ass in the air, but he knows he shouldn’t – he’s taken Evelyn in this position often enough, grabbed her hips and moved her back and forth on his cock until she was screaming his name. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, and still the blush on his cheeks won’t dissipate.

Evelyn tries to push a second finger in again, and this time Cullen bites his cheek when he wants to tell her to stop. If she believes he can take, he’d at least try – it’s not like it hurts to the point where he feels like he needs to stop her, and he’s not against pain anyway. He likes it when Evelyn scratches him, when her teeth catch on the head of his cock – and he knows it’s not accidental. Evelyn knows just as well as him that there is something to be explored, and he wonders if that’s why she’s trying this with him.

“Good?” she asks as Cullen gets used to the second finger in his ass. He nods and can’t keep himself from whining when her fingernail catches on the head of his cock, scratching in a deliciously painful way. She does it again when she realises he likes it, and Cullen has to bite into his wrist to keep from screaming.

“There’s something else I can put into you.” Cullen almost cries out as her fingers leave him and Evelyn stumbles back over to their wardrobe, opening the same drawer where she had gotten the oil from. When she comes back, she is carrying a glass phallus in her hand – it’s small, much smaller than Cullen in both girth and length, but he still gulps in a breath of air when he looks at it. Maybe they should start with something even smaller – there must be… beginner sizes, or something of the sort.

“On your back,” Evelyn slaps his ass just where it meets his thigh, the sound of it echoing in the room. Cullen obediently rolls over, his arms automatically going above his head and holding onto the head of the bed, like she wants him to when she’s on top. She smiles when she sees how natural this position comes to him by now – he’s gotten months to get used to it.

“Now, just relax.”

Cullen snorts, but closes his eyes and tries to soothe his tense muscles by telling himself that Evelyn wouldn’t cause him harm – she might hurt him, but she knows his limits better than he knows them himself.

It’s weird at first, hearing Evelyn lube up the… appendage, and then feeling it press against his hole. She’s heated it to his body temperature, so at least it’s not cold against him, but Cullen still tenses up as she presses it inside him, not stopping until she’s satisfied with how deep it sits. He holds his breath until Evelyn takes off her hand.

“How does it feel?”

Cullen thinks for a few seconds, going over words in his head, before finally settling on one. “Full.”

“Yes.” Evelyn smiles. “It does that.”

“How deep is it in?” Cullen asks, hesitantly reaching down to feel for himself. He’s surprised that most of the phallus seems to be inside of him – only the bulb at the bottom sticking out. His finger goes from there to his stretched hole, feeling where the toy is stretching him. His mouth opens as he realises that, yes, it is actually inside of him, he’s doing this right now, and Evelyn is watching. He clears his throat and wants to say something to her, but all he can do is stupidly smile up at her.

Evelyn chuckles and then wraps her hand around his cock, slowly jerking him off. Cullen pulls back his hand and places them back above his head, his fingertips against the headboard, nails scratching against the wood. He hisses when Evelyn wraps her index finger and thumb around his balls, pressing down painfully and pulling slightly. His legs close automatically at the feeling, but Evelyn forces them back down to the bed, spread out so she has more space to work with. Cullen groans – it feels as if he had been punched in the gut, and Evelyn is not easing her grip, instead only holding him even tighter as she rubs her thumb over the head of his cock with the other hand.

“You like this, don’t you?” she asks, and Cullen bites his lip.

“Yes,” he admits, his cock jerking in her grip when she uses her nail on him again.

“And this?” Evelyn leans down to take his cock in her mouth, letting her teeth graze over his shaft with every upwards bob of her head.

“Yes,” Cullen moans, digging his nails into the headboard. “Maker, yes, Evelyn…”

She giggles and leans back, stroking over his cock with a flat palm and placing it so that it lies on Cullen’s stomach, pointing upwards to his belly button. He breathes out deeply when the fingers around his balls let go, his muscles relaxing as his sack aches. He wants to reach down and touch it, make sure everything feels normal, but Evelyn wouldn’t like it if he moved his arms again.

A light slap to his balls makes him wince and almost sit up, staring at Evelyn as she stares back at him. Everything is already throbbing between his legs, and the slap had felt like yet another blow to his abdomen – and it hadn’t even been that hard, barely more than a caress.

He nods at her to do it again as he lies down, knowing that she’d wait for a confirmation of his enjoyment before doing it again. The next tap is harder, and Cullen’s legs close again and traps her hand, but he forces himself to lie them flat on the bed again, his knees spread out to either side. He can see the flush on his chest, reaching down to his navel and turning his pale skin pink.

“I wish I had some clamps I could put here,” Evelyn muses as she strokes over the base of his cock and his balls. 

“You could keep them there while I would ride you, and with every movement of my body I would pull on the skin, remind you that they’re there…”

Cullen’s cock jerks without being touched, pre-come dribbling out of the head. His breathing is heavy and his heart is pounding, and the thinks that if Evelyn would only just take him in hand again and stroke him, he would be coming in seconds.

“Do you want me to buy some?” Evelyn asks, raising her eyebrow when she sees him spilling onto his abdomen.

“Yes,” Cullen whispers – he likes the pinch of her nails when they scratch over his skin, and the clamps might feel similar to that, he figures.

“Inquisition funds well spent, hm?” Evelyn teases him, saying the exact same words he had used when mocking her for spending money on her underclothes. Cullen closes his eyes in embarrassment.

“That was- You know I didn’t mean that.”

“Of course. Because it was mean, and you wouldn’t be mean to me, right?” Evelyn asks, grinning as she strokes her fingers over Cullen’s cock. “Only I’m allowed to be mean to you.”

“Yes, Evie…” Cullen nods his head, at the point where he would probably agree with her on anything just to get his cock touched. She laughs at him, but seems to accept his apology as she climbs on his lap, guiding his cock into her pussy. She moves slowly, making Cullen whine and push up his hips desperately, trying to quicken their pace. Evelyn places her hands on his chest and pushes him down with all her might. She doesn’t use her magic to restrain him, and Cullen is thankful – the one time she had tried that, he had felt uncomfortably reminded of the magical prison he had been trapped in in the Circle Tower, his erection going soft in her hands almost immediately. He knows she’d felt bad about it afterwards – she hadn’t used her magic on him since then.

“Where do you want to come?” Evelyn asks, knowing that Cullen is close to bursting. “My face? Mouth? My tits? Inside me?”

“Inside,” Cullen groans, even though he knows he shouldn’t. They can’t afford to risk a potential pregnancy during their war with Corypheus, but he can’t himself – he fantasises about coming inside her every time they have sex, having to force himself to pull out when he’s close to coming, spilling in her mouth or on her body instead.

“All right,” Evelyn whispers, speeding up her movements, taking Cullen’s cock deep before she sits up again, so far that only the head of it is still inside her, before sitting down again. Cullen is writhing, and he can’t keep himself from touching her anymore, his hands coming to rest on her waist as he holds her in place and fucks up into her, his hips snapping against her. She lets him use her until he’s coming, groaning as he spends himself, his limbs feeling heavy and tired the second he’s flat on the mattress.

He might have passed out for a few seconds, because the next thing he feels are Evelyn’s fingers in his mouth. He opens his eyes as he sucks on them, letting out a surprised noise as he licks his own come, mixed with her flavour. She’s feeding his own seed to him, he realises, as she removes her fingers to push them inside of her again. When she pulls them out, they’re glistening with his sperm, and he bashfully opens his mouth again when she rubs against his lips.

“Good boy,” she praises again, smiling. Cullen closes his eyes as he swallows, keeping them shut as Evelyn climbs up so she’s sitting on his face again, letting him lick the rest of his spend out of her cunt. The taste and smell is so strong, Cullen feels lightheaded with it, but he does his duty and cleans her up, rolling her clit between his lips as he’s finished. Evelyn sighs and glides her fingers between her lips, rubbing at herself as Cullen stabs his tongue back inside of her, and it doesn’t take long until Evelyn is coming for a second time that evening, gushing more of their combined fluids into Cullen’s mouth. 

She lies down next to him and cuddles onto his side, and she’s almost asleep before Cullen nudges her.

“Eve, um…” he trails off, chuckling tiredly. “Could you remove the…”

Evelyn nods, yawns, then sits up again between Cullen’s spread legs, stroking over his thigh as she pulls on the toy. It hurts more going out than it did going in, and Cullen clenches his eyes shut as the widest part slides out, leaving him empty. He feels dirty and wet between his cheeks, but Evelyn gets up to wash it in the remaining water from their bath, after wetting a towel and throwing it at Cullen. He’s glad she’s turned away as he cleans himself between his cheeks, dropping the towel next to the bed after drying himself off. Evelyn stores the phallus and oil back in the drawer before crawling back into bed with him.

“Now, that wasn’t so bad, was it?” she asks, nudging his side.

“I’m sure we both enjoyed it.”

Evelyn giggles, then throws an arm around him and kisses his forehead. Cullen is tired, but he knows they should talk about this – the obvious power shift that had happened between them. He’d never been very pushy in bed, left everything up to her, but she’d never… dominated him before.

“Should I do this more often?” Evelyn asks, stroking the back of her hand over Cullen’s cheek. “Take charge? Did you like it?”

“I did.” Cullen nods.

“And the clamps? Should I actually buy them?”

“Yes.” Cullen hides his smile in her hair, now completely dry and slightly curly. He strokes over her back until he’s too tired to continue, his whole body lax from his orgasm. There is still a slight ache in his balls, but he enjoys the slight pulsating pain – it reminds him of the way she had gripped and slapped him there, and if he’d be able to come again, his cock would have twitched. Instead, he only lets out a rumbly mixture between a groan and a sigh, one of his hands drifting down to cup Evelyn’s ass.

“Sleep,” she says, then bites his nipple. Cullen chuckles and pulls back his hand, resting it on her hip.

 

She buys the clamps, after, from what Cullen understands, was an awkward conversation with The Iron Bull.

“He asked me what I needed them for,” Evelyn says, lying on the bed with her arm in front of her eyes. “Wouldn’t stop until I told him where I wanted to use them. He told me to be safe, and have you use a watchword.

“A watchword?” Cullen asks, a little distracted as he reads over a report from Ser Lysette, lamenting the fact that some of the soldiers are staying out too late at night, trying to woo the servants. Cullen can only shake his head – Lysette was just a recruit when the Templar Order split from the Chantry, and all she had known were the strict rules they had to follow during their training. He remembers the consequences they were threatened with, should they find themselves in a bed that weren’t their own – it’s clear Lysette had taken them to heart, as well. “And you told him where you will use them? You’re telling me The Iron Bull knows that you’ll… put them…”

“He knows. He also said he thought as much, and that he’s glad I’m finally pulling the stick out of your arse.”

“Oh.” Cullen scratches his head. “A watchword, though? Do you think we’ll need that?”

Evelyn shrugs and takes her arm off her face, turning to look at Cullen. “Can’t hurt, right? It’s easier than guessing on your body language if it’s good pain, or bad pain.”

“It just seems so… serious.” Cullen gets up from the chair behind the desk and walks over towards the bed, sitting down and looking at Evelyn. He strokes his hand through her hair and then down her throat, letting his hand travel down until it’s resting on her breast. He unbuttons her blouse down to the middle of the fabric, parting it so he can lean down and let his tongue trail over it, before he leans back and admires his handiwork. Her breasts shine with his saliva, and there’s a lazy grin on her face.

“We can be quite serious sometimes, can’t we? It certainly felt serious when I had you by your balls, whimpering beneath me.”

Cullen’s cock jerks in his trousers but they have a meeting at the war table in just a few minutes – they’ve only gone to their quarters to collect some of the reports they’d worked on during the day. Well, Cullen had – Evelyn had just taken the chance to lie down on the bed and close her eyes for a few moments. He can’t fault her. She’s been working with Morrigan on the Eluvian, and planning their attack in the Arbor Wilds. She’s training with the mages every day, trying to perfect their spells – he’s seen her work on her fireballs, and they’re coming along nicely. Fire is usually her weakest element, and he’s pleasantly surprised by how quick she’s managing to catch up with the others.

“We should get back down,” he says, pinching her thigh. “They’ll think we’re up to something if we’re late.”

“We could be up to something.” Evelyn reaches to his crotch, trying to find his cock through the thick material of his trousers, and then squeezing him when her fingers wrap around him. “I could suck you off right now, make it quick, and then we’ll go downstairs like nothing ever happened.”

“Only you’ll want to rub yourself against the corner of the war table,” Cullen chuckles, grabbing her hand and moving it away from his hardening cock. “You won’t listen to a thing Leliana, Josephine, or Morrigan will tell you.”

“Morrigan will be there?” Evelyn asks, trying to sound casual, but failing. There’s a knot right between her eyebrows, telling Cullen how she really feels about Morrigan being there. He had heard enough on the balcony in the Winter Palace, Evelyn’s veiled threats of throwing Morrigan out at the first misstep, and Morrigan’s flippant responses. Evelyn couldn’t afford to send her away, and the witch knows that.

“It’s another debriefing about what we might find in the Temple of Mythal,” Cullen explains, massaging Evelyn’s hand, “it shouldn’t go on for too long.”

“I’d rather stay here with your cock in my mouth,” Evelyn mumbles, rolling onto her front and resting her head on Cullen’s crotch. It’s tempting, allowing her to do this right now, but he’d have to take off his armour and get redressed afterwards – it would just take too long.

“Afterwards,” Cullen promises, then softly pushes Evelyn until she slides off the bed and onto the floor. He chuckles as she pretends to lie dead on her back, her eyes closed and her face pulled into a frown. “Don’t be so dramatic.” He nudges her with his boot.

“I’d rather die than go downstairs,” Evelyn says, still not moving a muscle. Cullen scratches his head, not sure what to do with her. “Please, Cullen,” she pleads, turning onto her side and wrapping her arms around his legs, “don’t make me talk to Morrigan.”

“I’ll send a guard down to inform them that you’re unwell.” Cullen sighs as he stands up, Evelyn rolling onto her back again and smiling up at the ceiling. He’s not good at saying no to her, and he knows that he should probably force her to get up and go downstairs, but he feels for her. He’s annoyed at the endless meetings as well – they’re mostly useless. His soldiers are trained and ready to fight, and their speculations about what will or will not be inside the Temple don’t help them in any way – whatever they will find within would be stranger than anything they can imagine.

He informs the guards outside Evelyn’s quarters, sending one of them to Josephine to reschedule the meeting. When he walks back up the stairs, he sees her already back on the bed, her boots, trousers, and blouse already discarded and thrown carelessly on the floor. He picks them up and hangs them over the back of the couch, watching as Evelyn wiggles out of her breast band and smallclothes, grinning at him. She knows she won the argument, and she’s gloating.

Not for the first time, Cullen wants to reverse their roles and teach her a lesson.

“Two days until we march out,” Evelyn says, running her fingers down her tan skin. “I might not come back.”

 

“Don’t say things like that.” Cullen frowns at her as he takes off his coat, hanging it onto the armour stand they had moved in together with him. He undoes the straps to his armour carefully, not wanting to rip something so close to a big battle – they couldn’t afford it, with resources already stretched so thin. “You’re the one who has to survive, out of all of us, and I’ll protect you until my last, dying breath.” He clenches his teeth. He would throw himself in front of a demon if it meant Evelyn came out unscathed.

“Yes, yes, I’m the only one who can close rifts.” Evelyn holds her left hand up in a mockery of how he’s seen her seal rifts, the anchor softly glowing. “Without me the world is doomed.”

“Yes,” Cullen says as he hangs up his chest piece, “but not just because of that. Also because I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Evelyn says, rolling onto her side and watching him strip off the rest of his armour. “I don’t want you to die just to save me.”

Cullen steps out of his boots before walking over to the bed, settling down next to Evelyn. She crawls on top of him, one of her knees pressed between his legs, snugly against his cock and balls. She kisses him as he brushes back the few strands of hair that had fallen from her braid.

“I can’t promise you that,” Cullen says after, wincing when Evelyn presses her knee into his crotch, effectively shutting him up. He rolls his eyes after closing them, but he’s sure Evelyn still sees it. 

He listens as she rummages in a box shoved beneath their bed, a new fixture in the room. They had gotten tired of keeping all their things in Evelyn’s dresser, taking away precious space for more clothes (and Cullen had rolled his eyes then, as well), so a new wooden box with a lid is now where they store all their naughty things. And there were more and more, as time went on.

“Lift your arms,” Evelyn says, and Cullen complies. It takes only a few seconds for Evelyn to take off his shirt and tie him to the headboard of the bed, smooth rope wrapped around his wrists. He likes this better than being restrained with magic - it doesn’t feel bad. When she’s satisfied with her ties, Evelyn lies down between his legs, where his cock is already straining against the fabric of his trousers, his body already reacting to what he knows will come. He licks over his lips as Evelyn peels down the last of his clothes and throws them off the bed, then lightly licks over his cock where it is resting against his thigh.

“And you’re sure you want this?” she asks, and Cullen can practically hear the raised eyebrow in her voice. He nods. “Tell me if it hurts too much, all right? I don’t  _ actually  _ want to do lasting damage.”

Cullen listens as Evelyn rummages through the clamps - there are many of them, he knows, small and silver. He’s put one on the skin on his finger before, trying to get a feel on how they’d be on the more sensitive parts of his body. His heart rate picks up when he feels the first one on his balls, Evelyn’s finger still holding it open as she pinches some of the skin. 

“Ready?” she asks, and Cullen nods. It doesn’t feel like much at first, and he’s almost tempted to ask if she had really let go, but then the pain settles in, growing stronger and stronger with each passing second. He breathes out from his mouth, a small whine escaping him as Evelyn puts another clamp on him, on the opposite side of his sack. 

“ _ Maker _ ,” Cullen gasps, pressing his head back into the mattress, “it’s…   _ oh- _ ”

Evelyn puts the third clamp onto the underside of his cock, near the base. Cullen resorts to breathing techniques he’s learned during his Templar training, specifically taught to get through excruciating pain - the only other time he’s needed them had been in the Fereldan tower. He’s so concentrated on his technique, he barely notices Evelyn putting even more clamps onto him - he counts up to seven when she stops reaching for more and instead wraps her lips around the head of his cock.

She sucks hard and fast, taking him into her mouth until her lips brush against the clamps at the base. Cullen swears he can see stars behind his closed eyelids, and he feels his orgasm approaching before he even really has time to enjoy Evelyn’s mouth. If he could, he’d reach down and pull her off, make her pause for a few seconds while he willed himself to keep calm, but all he can do is pull on the restraints that keep his arms over his head. 

He spills with a strangled moan, his ears burning when he hears the surprised noise Evelyn makes before she swallows his seed. It’s embarrassing, coming so quickly, but the clamps - they still hurt, but something about the pain had pushed him like nothing else had ever before. 

The pain as Evelyn takes them off, however, makes him writhe and groan, wishing she would just leave them where they are so he could take them off himself, later. It’s worse than putting them on and leaving them there, and Cullen wants to reach down to check if he’s bleeding, though he knows Evelyn would tell him if she had broken his skin. She’d also heal him, not wanting him to walk around with a wound, no matter where and how small, before a big battle. 

“You alive?” he hears her ask after all the clams are gone from his body and he has gone silent. Cullen forces himself to nod as Evelyn reaches up to untie his hands. “That went well, didn’t it? You like them.”

“Yes,” Cullen agrees, not knowing what more to say. He still feels embarrassed whenever Evelyn coaxes reactions like this out of him. He wants to see her like this, too, lost for words and at his mercy, but he’s not sure he’d ever be as good at this as she is - being commanding on the battlefield doesn’t exactly transfer perfectly into the bedroom. Still, he entertains the thought of making her feel like he is right now - lightheaded, and with a bone deep exhaustion that can only come from a good orgasm. 

He opens his mouth to look up at her as she stores away their things. “I don’t think I can- I mean, you could sit on my face-”

“Don’t worry,” Evelyn strokes through his hair and then over his cheek. “Just sleep, all right? You can get me off in the morning.

Cullen smiles and nods, turning on his side and spooning Evelyn against his chest.

“I love you,” he whispers into her hair, and Evelyn giggles.

“You better mean it. I don’t think you’ll easily find another girl who’ll do to you, what I do to you.” 

Cullen chuckles tiredly, then nods. “You’re not so easy to replace.” He clasps his hand with Evelyn’s, then presses a kiss against her neck. He’ll marry her, one day, he knows already.

He’ll marry her, or he’ll die before he has the chance to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please..... validate me..........

**Author's Note:**

> gamlen.tumblr.com


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